I had the distinct pleasure of watching the Jazz game via my parent's bedroom tonight. The family room had been taken over by an army of teenage boys (some who call me Aunt) of sharp wit and unfailing energy. My parents and I fled the scene as we were no match for such a crowd.As the game progressed we found ourselves also becoming involved--during commercial breaks--with a Vh1 documentary about feminism. I am so confused about my identity with the whole movement which started decades ago and still wages on today. Most of the time I feel that I am the anti Feminist-of-Today, she who yearns to not just be equal to man, but be man. But I like the feminist who cheers on the causes of free-spirited women. Women who can make their own life choices based on intuition and female divinity.
There was a segment in the documentary where the feminists of the sixties talked about how they decided to protest the Miss America pageant. The film split scenes from energetic women burning their bras outside the convention center to polite women walking down the Miss America stage in their evening gowns. Women holding "sisterhood power!" signs. Women holding bouquets of roses. Back-and-forth.
I looked at my parents. They were engrossed.
"Which one would you rather have your daughter doing, the protesting or the pageantry?" I asked very intrigued.
They slowly peeled their eyes from the tv to my direction.
"The pageant. Of course." My dad said.
"The protest." Replied my mom.
Interesting.
Then when the game became too intense for my mother to watch she left the room. My dad and I were alone flipping between the channels.
"Dad?" I asked.
"Yes?" He replied.
"Did you really mean the pageant? You know that in real life, your daughter would probably be doing the protesting. Not to be mean, just to be different. You raised me that way."
He thought for a second.
"No, really, I'd want you to be in the pageant."
I exhaled. Was my dad losing his edge? I had a feeling that he'd always quietly championed my causes for the contrary.
In the last seconds of the game, as the Jazz were trying to pull out a win, I caught on to my dad's maneuvering. He could never admit that he liked his daughter to be The Protester. Doing so would extinguish the flame that he had worked so hard to stoke.
His game: Hide the Pride.
Well anyway, GO JAZZ!
***Image from JoFreeman.com
22 Pieces of Opinion:
Sisterhood power! Go CJane!
I love this post.
I'm going to refer to it next fall when my daughter digs in her heels (her buttercup yellow high-top Converse heels, actually) at the ridiculous new dress code at her middle school.
So c jane, should I join her (although I've already said my piece--to a reporter at the Deseret News, no less) or watch quietly from the sidelines?
Hmmmm...if we're going for sisterhood power would we be protesting our sister's choices to be flaunting their bodies in bikinis, or giving them the right to do it? Even if we hate it.
I don't know.
Go Jazz, er, whatever.
I cannot remember when I wasn't involved in a cause. The earliest one was the United Farm Workers of America. I was boycotting lettuce in front of Safeway when I was about 9 with my mother, hence forth Ceasar Chavez is a houshold name in my house, he also hangs on the wall, lest my children forget....
Good Blog
Heidi, rightbackatcha!
CW, I vote watch quietly. Make it all hers. See how far she goes!
Leisha, great point. The very pinnacle of the feminist quandary.
Cynthia, I love it. It seems to me that you are raising a crew of your own free-thinking ladies.
I am all for moms staying at home and being moms.
I like the idea of work if you want to not because you are a woman and you have to prove something.
I am not into the feminist movement. For the most part I think it is wrong.
This is my opinion and what I believe. Nothing else.
I'm with the councilwoman: 90% of me hates the Miss America pageant and all other beauty or 'scholarship' pageants.
The other 10% of me loves the train wreck.
"U.S. Americans, such as..."
H.L., the right to "work if you want to" is EXACTLY what the feminist movement is about "for the most part"!
The shrill fringe, the drama, the "wanting to be a man" make for good TV on VH1, but comprise the distant edges of the movement.
Support the fringe, oppose the fringe, or have no opinion on it, but please don't mistake it for "the most part" of the equality effort.
And please know that the quiet, modest, strong-woman feminist, supportive of her family and community, and proud of her role in them, is the most common type!
Wait...how can you think the feminist movement is wrong? Really, I mean it. Without it, we couldn't vote, we wouldn't be paid as much as men for the same work done(wait, we STILL aren't) and if we chose to work, or if we HAD to work our only options would be like, a nurse and/or schoolteacher.
If you are for women being honored and respected as equal counterparts to men, then you must honor the work done to create that!
(P.S. I am not down with shrill, anti-men propoganda and the such, but I don't consider that feminism, even if it is labeled as such...)
I think the feminist movement of the 70s seemed good at the time, but has actually punished women today.
I feel the negative affects of the feminist movement each and every time I tell someone I want to be a SAHM someday, when I discuss my concerns over daycare, over the counter day-after pills available to teens, etc...
The sexual liberating movement or whatever you want to call it is the cause for even more bad. It used to be that you could just go out with someone, now in a lot of cases men expect x,y,z by date 2 or 3. Sad.
I am anti-feminist. I do not connect myself with that movement and never will. As a woman of color I know that that particular movement had little to do with black women and their needs. I am actually a womanist, which is something that I learned about in black history. Just comes closer to what I believe.
(sorry this was long, I just wrote a huge paper on this)
A womanist? I am going to wikipedia for further investigation.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Womanism
Here ya go!!
Haha, just like a dad--he's probably just so proud of you he'd want to see you on stage, beaming. And your mother, typical mother wanting her daughter to be "strong." I think most parents are like that.
I watched part of that show too! I also found it interesting. I am grateful that women of the past stood up for their rights. It has made it easier for all of us to make the choices that we feel are best for ourselves and not have someone else dictate what we should do.
As a full time mom and and part time worker (of three jobs...I digress), I love having the freedom to choose what to do with my life! I love working. I found something that I feel passionate about. But I also love my role as a wife and mother. I think that we can strike a balance between motherhood and employment if we so choose. Some of us have to work out of necessity. Isn't it nice that we, as women, don't have to be stuck at the bottom. Women of the past have paved the way for us, if we choose, to have good jobs, be successful and earn enough money to support our families.
Women who work are not sluffing off the sacred nature and responsiblity of motherhood. Being a feminist and motherhood can go together.
(Sorry if this is long, but I am so tried of always being judged for working....)
PS GO JAZZ!!!
I may not a have a full definition of the feminist movement. Sorry.
But I still believe that if one parent (father or mother) can be at home with the kids then they should.
As stated before. My opinion only. Nothing else.
Creole-
Love the 'womanist' definition-it is great. I agree with you and consider myself a 'womanist' or 'humanist'. I am priviledged to have been raised by people who taught me I was only limited by my desires and ambitions, not by my gender.
cjane-I hope you are doing well! Can't wait to hear about the chief's arrival and of course first trip to Target!
Leslie
Oh my gosh I love this post. I have such amazing respect for women who created the movement. As time progresses I think we forget that the very crux of the movement is the right to chose. All in all it reminds me of my favorite Sandra Day O'Connor quote:
Young women today often have very little appreciation for the real battles that took place to get women where they are today in this country. I don't know how much history young women today know about those battles.
-Sandra Day O'Connor
I am always amazed when people characterize feminism as "wanting to be a man" as if the desire for self determination negates the feminine self or the desire for motherhood - it doesn't.
Feminism is just the simple notion that women should be equal to men, equality does not mean sameness, and self determination requires choice. Your choice may not be my choice.
"I am priviledged to have been raised by people who taught me I was only limited by my desires and ambitions, not by my gender."
That is feminism.
Women of our generation have reaped so many benefits of the early feminist movement - then adopt a misconception of what it is.
If you choose to be a SAHM, great. I am one and love it. Haven't you enjoyed greater access to education, scholarships, sports {title 9}career choices and earning power prior to motherhood? Would you like equal rights in the legal arena, healthcare, divorce, finance or end of life issues? What about women that choose to be childless, mothers who choose to work, women you can't bear children, or mothers who have to work?
What about men? How has feminism changed things? The fathers you see proudly walking around with babies strapped in front packs and gladly changing diapers are more a result of the discourse of the feminist movement and wanting men to take an greater part in what was once considered 'the woman's domain' than they are from any rigid gender roles prescribed by proponents of the traditional family.
okay. Stepping down from the soapbox.
Hey anonymous. What?
I love this post--It gave me goosebumps. Your dad reminds me of mine.
but what about the talent competition? wouldn't that be fun for miss-burst-into-song-cjane?
i guess you could sing while holding a picket sign. but i don't imagine doing a celine song justice while protesting.
i guess it's just me.
(wanting to be different.)
If nothing else, the feminist movement made men step up to the plate and be better men. For example, my grandpa didn't know what a vacuum was, my father knew where the vacuum was and my husband is in charge of the vacuum!
Go Sistas!
-Lana
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