Our brother Topher recently visited Stephanie and Christian in Arizona. He wrote this short update and said I could post it on my blog.
Hi c,
I thought I would send a note about my experiences today. If you think it would be appropriate for the blog, go for it. If not, I understand. I tried not to make inappropriate jokes, but it's sort of my personality. You'll enjoy it anyway.
I got to Phoenix about 1:55. Mom, Dad, and Matt picked me up and we drove to the hospital which felt like it was about 2 minutes away. Stephanie was in her surgery at the time, so I went in to see Christian. His eyes were open and he seemed really awake. I told him that his kids were fine and told him about how Claire and Jane and Phoebe were playing "teenagers" at our house on Monday. And how they were pretending like they had cell phones and text messaging, etc. I think he liked hearing that. He kept raising his arms the whole time. I got a sense that he was really happy to hear about his kids. I'm hoping it was that, and not that I was driving him crazy. (Get....him.....OUT!!!!) Anyway, he seemed really alert and focused, but the nurse came and put him to sleep, which is probably better for him.
I like how the nurses talk to Stephanie and Christian. There is a tendency for us to talk to them like they are babies, but the nurses don't do that. They talk like they are regular adults who need a little help. I try to remember that when I talk to them. I try to make jokes and tell them things that would interest them.
We had dinner with Russ and Mary for Christian's sister Liz's birthday. Peter and his wife Darin were there as well. It was really nice - we went to that Orange Pizza joint everyone's been buzzing about. I thought it was good. Matt and I shared a plate of spicy wings!
Finally I got to see Stephanie around 8:00. It was a very sweet experience. I enjoyed talking to her, even though she is heavily sedated and cannot respond. I got to give her a blessing, which was also really great for me. I told her about her kids as well and played her some CD's I made for her with awesome tunes. I actually really loved being there with her. I appreciate everyone who prepared me for what I was going to see. It was a very positive experience for me. I only wish someone had prepared me for those nerdy oil murals at the burn center! With the rainbows and the waterfalls? I need two CC's of Lisa Valentine Clark and some oil paint STAT!
I am in Stephanie's kitchen now - this is my first time at her house and I really like it. It has lots of memories and it feels like her spirit here. I am more than happy to let Matt sleep in Stephanie and Christian's big, comfortable bed while I sleep in Ollie's dwarfish twin. Seriously, as long as Matt is comfortable I'm just fine. There is a big lightning storm tonight.
The doctor gave us some good news today - Stephanie's facial surgery went well. They worked on her hands and her face. They were able to preserve her ears and nose. There is some concern about skin and some other things, but he seemed very straight forward and encouraging. I think Mom and Dad were thrilled. My sense is that Stephanie has been given a choice: she could move on and do some great work on the other side, or she could stay here and make a new life from this accident. To me, it feels like she's made the choice. I know it's been devastating, but I feel like she's coming back.
I am very encouraged and proud of Stephanie.
cc
103 Pieces of Opinion:
Oh my goodness. Topher is hilarious...and yet so sensitive. I love his last paragraph.
It is so good to read about Stephanie's progress and to realize that she is fighting fighting fighting to get back to the life she loves to live.
I love when people can make you laugh and cry all at once. You all are doing that daily! Thank you. I love what he said about making a choice. She really is incredible. And so are all of you.
thanks for the update. it's wonderful to see your example of a good family doing such a great job at being positive and hopeful. all the best.
What a wonderful, touching update. Always in our prayers and thinking of ways to donate.
Stephanie and Christian are so blessed to have you all for family. It is all of you that will pull them through this! Thank you for sharing with all of us and letting us be part of their prayer cirlce!
Good, good news. So very glad!!
xoxo
Thank you for the update...We all continue to check in on a regular basis and pray for the Lord's will to be done...
I can hardly wait for the day when both Stephanie and Christian will get to see all the lives they have touched. I'm pretty sure they already are feeling the love that is being sent their way. I'm reminded to stop taking the little things for granted, and to stop being such the persnickety, irritating fool that I've wasted too much time being.
Sending more and more love each day.
p.s. the oil murals sound awful. Perhaps when she's able, Steph can offer her artistic abilities to the walls of the burn center to be edified in her good taste.
yeah about her ears and nose! she will be happy to have them when she gets out of there!!!
I too feel like she was able to make a choice, and I believe as she put it, she chose her "heaven on earth".
thank you for the update, we appreciate more than you know.
Continued prayers on their behalf and, as always, thank you for the updates.
I am so moved by your words (cjane and topher). Thanks for the continual updates. So many of us are keeping up with you guys because we love Nie and her family. I hope to know you all one day. I pray for you all daily. It's times like these when I cling to our testimony of the gospel and the plan of happiness. May God continue to bring peace to you and yours.
Topher is a great story teller but really hits it home by saying that she has made her choice!
Maybe she feels the strength of so many of us cheering her on and praying for her! You guys are such a wonderful family with a great testimony!
Thanks for the update (and tears and laughter). They are continually in our thoughts and prayers.
Thank you, thank you for sharing this letter cjane. It was wonderful to feel Tohper's humor and tender love for his sister and her husband through his words.
hi, c:)
it sounds like prayers are being answered, and what a lovely thing is that!!!
big hugs for all,
dani
Oh my WORD, where is the tissue!?!?!
From a total stranger here all the way in Australia-my love and best wishes to you and your gorgeous family. Your strength and faith is incredible-may it see you through this trying time.
Love from me and mine
Meganxx
Hello, I have never commented on your blog before and only came across it today because of another blogger who told the story of your sister and husbands accident. I had no idea what the blog entry would be when I started to read, but I was struck by the beautiful lady shown in the photograph and after reading the post the lady said it was a photo of your sister and her family which brought me to your blog. I was very saddened to read the full story and I would just like to add my best wishes for a speedy recovery from my husband and I in the UK. You are all doing a great job in what must be very difficult circumstances.
I love the tenderness and hope and funny that you and Topher and the rest of your family exude. You inspire me. Congrats to Stephanie on the good news. I'm proud of her, too, although i only know her from a distance.
how precious. how very, very precious. this family is astounding. think about how happy the world would be if EVERYONE had such loving and selfless families.
I am so happy about the good news.
And your brother is awesome. Your whole family seems to be so positive and great. What an awesome example.
Much love from Sweden.
I can't help but comment, It is so wonderful to hear that Stephanie and Christian are fighting like they are! It brings tears to my eyes! I continue to pray for their strength as they recover and for the children too of course!
What a great update. I'm glad the doctors are up front with you guys about their progress. I'm sure Christian and Stephanie loved hearing about their family. We pray for them every day. Even our 3 yr old is remembering to pray for them.
Thank you for the updates and letting "us" be a part of this extraordinarily difficult time. I continue to pray for them, the children, your families and the doctors. Much love. julie
I'm new to your family's story and I just wanted to send all my love and good thoughts your way. Your sister and her family are so lucky to have such carig people surrounding them. I'll keep them in my thoughts.
In times like this...the only phrase that seems to get me through is
"Be still and KNOW that I am God". My heart aches for your pain....but I am sure that Stephanie's recovery will be expedited by the fact that all her babies are with family. Please know that you are all on my mind often and I continue to thank God for a quick recovery.
Wonderful news about Stephanie and Christian...every little bit of progress is wonderful. I agree with what Topher said regarding Stephanie having a choice and she chose to fight, she's not done touching lives here...
What a good update. I am glad you posted the letter.
Again, many prayers and good thoughts! I am sending out a card today : )
thanks for the update we still pray for all your family!
Zar, Uno and family.
So touching! I believe in my heart that Stephanie's a fighter. Even though I don't know her, only from her inspiring blog, I believe that anyone in that situation, especially Steph, could have given up. I'm sure our Heavenly Father would have let her, but she is so strong and she has so much more to give here on earth. She has touched me in so many ways, and this whole experience has opened my eyes to a new way of life. Your family is so inspiring. To turn such a tragedy into such a learning, growing positive experience is truly amazing, and I will forever be changed. Prayers.
Thank you for the updates. I'm so happy that Stephanie's surgeries are going well. Topher is so funny yet so sensitive. I'm sure he's a wonderful brother to have. Keeping all of you in our prayers!
thank you for posting...this is great news! I love topher's blog. anytime i need a laugh i go there. very witty!
Thank you for the update. Our prayers and thoughts are always with all of you. She must know that she has more to do here and that He is with her.
Hooray for some good news!
And what a great family! It is wonderful how you are all pulling together and sharing and working so hard for each other.
Thanks for the smile and tears today.
Thanks for the wonderful update Topher!! Keep them coming! You all remain in our thoughts and prayers.
Thank you for letting us here more about their condition. I know it is difficult for your family, and i hope they continue to progress. I, for one, have lots of questions about the medical coma and Christians eyes being open, but him not talking. Is that a normal thing? I am supposing so, but, if you feel like expounding, that would be great. I am glad that they still have loads of family visiting them and spending time with them.
my heart goes out to you and your family. your strength is incredible. this is putting life and trials into perspective for so many people by each of you sharing a part of yourselves with so many of us. my prayers and thoughts are with your family, cjane. there truly are angels on earth--in your family and in those two hospital rooms in AZ. May God bless you all and especially Stephanie and Christian at this time!
So very tender. Glad to hear the surgery went well. We will still keep them in our prayers.
I bet Steph loved having her funny older brothers there. Great update-
Does anyone have a back up plan? When Stephanie and Christian see what the blog world and beyond has been doing? I hope their heart can take it. I am in more than awe myself. Thanks for the update. I can't wait to met her.
Thank you so much for the update! I'm all the way across the country, not related, don't even know your family, but my heart and prayers are with you all!
Thank you for the update. I don't even know you, but am so invested in this, that you all are constantly on my mind. When my family went to the BYU game, I thought of Nie Nie and her family as tears welled up in my eyes. I appreciate the updates!
He's a keeper.
I don't know you or your family, but I am a sister, a mother, a daughter, and a wife so I can relate. I just wanted to say that we are praying for your family and I will continue to check in until the day when you post the lovely pictures of your Nie and her husband reunited with their beautiful children. It is so wonderful to have some POSITIVE, FAITH-FILLED, FAMILY messages to read each day. I am in awe of the strength and love you all exude at this time. Thank you for being wonderful examples of what I should strive for each day. And congratulations on the new exciting news regarding Nie's successful facial surgery. God Bless!
Man your family is amazing!! I loved the update thanks Topher.. You are hillarious yet you bring tears to my eyes at the same time. I am so glad to hear of the progress, and I love the outlook you brought up on Stephanie having the choice. Thanks...
How encouraging.
I love his last paragraph.
I hate that Topher made me cry. YOU can make me cry, LISA can make me cry, but when Topher gets all sweet and makes me tear up, I know it is something truly special...
SO glad to hear about the mummies. Esp that Christian knows that the cousins are playing "teenager" (awesome game btw...). That had to make whatever subconsious part of him can still hear, feel better.
My heart hurts. But also feels good. Odd, but true.
Very nicely put, Chris. I'm glad you got to go down there.
Every day I imagine Stephanie and Christian being anointed with the balm of Christ. It feels like everyone praying for them are all tied together and held up by an incredible love that just takes you in and envelopes all in peace. Such miracles are being worked here. Thank you so much for posting updates. Love and prayers from sandi in az
Topher and C-Jane. I don't know either of you and live all the way over here in NYC but I heard of your story and have been following all the way. I can't say how happy this post makes me. I don't know why. Maybe it's the hope in Topher's tone or simply the fact that day by day, they are healing. But I thank you for sharing this and someday, somewhere I hope to be at the big party that will welcome them home!
Hillary
What insightful and encouraging news on Steph and Christian. We pray for them every day.
Your brother Topher is hysterically funny. I'm excited to see who he makes "awesome" for his auction.
Thank you for the positive updates - I love reading about their progress.
Loves,
jenn
sheesh...I check your blog multiple times through out the day (I can't begin to tell you how your experiences have touched my life).
My little family prays for Stephanie and Christian everyday and we send lots of good wishes from Portland. We will be fasting for all of you this Sunday
Thanks for letting us share the news and pray and cry and celebrate with you. Thanks for being so very easy to love.
Hi Courtney,
Mom (aunt Janny) told me that she took the clothes over for the girls. I hope that they will fit. I was a little worried about the coats, but I sent then anyway.
Sounds like everyone is adjusting and getting into a routine. We love you all and know that many Heavenly Hosts are with you always!!
Love, Cousin Chrissy
Now THAT was great news! I'm so glad to hear about her spirit being there, in her home. Thank you for being so joyful and positive. As we read through tears everytime, we know that everyone will be taken care of. We will continue to pray.
This makes sense with your hourglass theory, c, that Stephanie can be both at home and maybe somewhat on the other side contemplating her options.
I hope the best for your family. Thank you for updating.
nienie and christian
fight very, very hard!
praying,
rose
I love to laugh-cry!
What a funny guy. I'm sure he lifted their spirits and I really like hearing his take on things.
His thoughts on her choice to stay or go is so beautiful. I think in certain situations we do get to choose. Heavenly Father is kind and wants us to be happy. She is the type of person who would have earned the right to have a choice and I know she will do great things in this life.
Chelsea
I'm so happy to hear this encouraging update!
I only know your family through the blog world, but I wanted to let you know that you've inspired my little family. We've been dealing with the most difficult trial of our lives with a very sick baby. He was born 13 weeks premature and has been very, very sick. It has been extremely difficult for us, but your family has inspired us. We realize that if you can keep the faith through this trial, we should be able to keep ours through our trial, which seems so much easier than what your family is facing. Thank you for giving us hope and perspective, even through this most difficult time. And please thank your mom for these words: "Remember to be grateful for the Lord every day of your life." I really needed to hear that.
As someone else just said, my heart is both hurting and smiling. Great update. As I read about the murals, my daughter happened to be watching "The Mighty B" where she sings about rainbows and unicorns....it made me snort outloud. Humor heals, I think they needed 2cc's of The Jolly P fo sho!!!!
c jane, this story is so tragic, I can't imagine what your family is going through. Are you doing any sort of product auctioning? Anything organized? I would be more than happy to mention it on my blog. Today's Creative Blog. I only had a moment to read yours, but I thought if someone was organizing an auction with donanted handmade items....that would be such an easy way for people to donate. Please let me know so I can get the word out.
kim
krjdemmon@comcast.net
Hi Kim,
If you have any auctions or benefit stuff you can take them over to the Nie Recovery blog. They are coordinating all of the benefit efforts so if you would like to host something, drop them an email.
Thanks!
Topher,
What a great brother you are! Thanks for the update. Your family is in our prayers.
Ken & Sheila Nelson
Thanks for that wonderful update! Our little family includes them in our daily prayers. It's wonderful to know that we still have choices on the other side and that life continues either way. And we get a glimpse into the eternal perspective of life.
What's going on with my shirt in that picture?
What a moving and beautiful update, we have been thinking of Stephanie and Christian non stop, they will continue to be in our prayers and thoughts.
Great post, good to read. Praying so much over here.....
incredible. It made me go give my 2 year-old a huge hug and tickles. I said, "You know I love you, right?" She looked at me sideways and said, "Yeah." kind of like, 'what's wrong with you, mom?'
WOW! They are SO blessed to have you and your family pulling for them every step. I continue to be moved by all the people that care for them. They are amazing people. Thank you so much for keeping us all updated on their recovery.
My heart and prayers go out to your family. The White family went through a simular trial over 5 years ago, when my daughter and her husband were in a plane crash near Prescott AZ. They also, were in Maricopa Burn Unit. If I can help your mom in any way let me know. The doc. there are some of the best in the world for burns.
Louie
Just found out about this today, from a friend of mine. My prayers are with all of you. It is so important to be positive... I got really sick with Bacterial Meningitis 3 1/2 years ago and was in a Comatose state. I heard my family around me I listened to the music they played for me...but I couldn't respond to them, it was really frustrating for me...but it helped me to gain the strength I needed just knowing my family was around. All the best to you! Christian and Stephanie sound like such great people! May the Lord's will be done...thanks for the reminder to be grateful...
I love hearing the updates, I check for them everyday. Even though I do not personally know Stephanie and Christian, I feel like I know them now. This story has touched me deeply and I think and pray for them all the time.
great update! i love to hear who they are both doing. I think of them everyday and am trying so hard to apprecaite EVERYTHING even the trials I have.
I hope all is well at your home too!
I just discovered your blog, and the story of Stephanie & Christian, in the last couple days. Wow. What an amazing, heartbreaking, intense journey it has been so far. Thank you for sharing it with us. I am praying for your family. For Stephanie and Christian as they continue to recover and for you as you care for their children. What a blessing family is.
Thank you, Chris, for the update.
Very well written as usual, with just the right amount of humor....
I must admit that I have cried a bit over her beautiful face---it will be hard. I know that I am vain, but it just made me so sad---so I was glad to hear that her face is doing well.
I am, of course, still your favorite stalker.
I went back and read through all of Nie Nie's entries recently - I couldn't help it. Towards the time of now, she expresses a lot the desire to share her beliefs through missionary work - I don't know that she would have chosen to share them in this way, but I am amazed at the amount of good that she, and indeed your family, is doing through this difficult time. Thank you for the updates - they are most appreciated, and I hope give you comfort to write them as they do us comfort to read them.
yay! today is going to be a great day no matter what because stephanie n. has her nose and ears!!
that is wonderful news!
been holding my breath about what might have happened to her beautiful face. who knew i would think so much about a sweet girl i don't even know?!
Wow.
Thank you for the update. You've all been in my prayers. You are so, so blessed to have each other.
I'm a friend of Azucar's that's been lurking on the Clark sibling blogs for the last year or so. I have been so moved by your family's experiences. My prayers are with you. Thank you for your amazing examples and your willingness to share these tender moments with the rest of us.
Hi...As others have said, I really appreciate you letting us in...I can't stop thinking of you all...I have thought over the years about what I think the human race does best...Art, music, great writing...But I think that by far what we do best is show kindness and love to each other...To those we know, and those we don't...In passing, or on a more permanent level...It's the best...Bless you...Jane, please remember to take care of yourself...Katie
Hi, I just found you through my friend Jen's blog. My heart just goes out to you and your family over the recent plane accident. I also live in Mesa and in April 1999 my husband and dad were in a small private plane accident in Flagstaff. However, we were very blessed as they were able to walk to road near where they crashed and then transported to the hospital there in Flag. It was a relatively short recovery but really took us to our knees in prayer. They both recovered very well, in fact it was a miracle they survived at all. If you would ever like to talk or just have someone who understands a little of what you are going through I would be happy to listen. You and all of your family will be in my prayers.
I started reading this blog the day that Stephanie and Christian got in the accident. I am constantly in awe of you and your family. Stephanie is so lucky to have such amazing siblings to pick right up, without hesitation, until she's ready to take back over. I don't think it's any wonder why she has decided to stick around and fight. You are all worth the struggle.
I do hope that she is staying on this side!!
I was so glad to read of their progress to date.
With all your positive attitudes and healing energy that you project, that will help them immensely when they are able to come home.
Thank you for the updates.
Kate
Really great news about Stephanie and Christian! Every new day is a good day and with your family's spirit anything is possible! You are a trully remarkable family, the love pours into your writings and into our hearts. I have prayed many times not only for their recovery but for your family's strength. Even during such devastation, Nie Nie is so very ispirational. Much love!!!
Stephanie has inspired me to laugh more, to love more, and to do and be more than I am. I think of her often, and pray for her recovery.
Another total stranger in Australia here, sending love and best wishes for the road ahead. God bless, Leanne
I've been following your family's crisis and feel as though I am at a loss for words. What could I possibly say? My son & I made Stephanie and Christian some cards this week and sent them off with prayers for you all. May God Bless!
This was amazing. His capacity to see that she had a choice and that either would be ok, it makes me weep.
If there is anything we could send from the Adirondacks that might put a spark in the kids' eyes I am able to be reached at amanda@sarabearco.com
Hugs and God's blessings for NieNie and Christian and their whole family. Thank you for posting information on how they are doing.
I am a stranger who has been touched by your family's story. I am hopeful for their recovery, I am in awe of your family. How lucky you all are to have each other. To have such an extended family is truly a blessing not many have.
I had a thought reginald means royalty or king right? Is he asking for The Lion King?
THANK YOU SO MUCH for the update! We would all love it if you could give us a DAILY UPDATE so we can follow their progress. Nothing lengthy - just a little news about their progress. Your update helped to get an idea of 'where they're at' in this long road home. Our prayers are with your entire family for as LONG AS YOU NEED THEM . . . and then some! God bless you all. We'll be checking in on you often.
Your friends in Idaho
(although we've never met!)
Oh my goodness....Tears and JOY....again! You truly are an amazing family.
thank you for sharing this. what a daunting challenge Nie Nie and Christian face-- a challenge fertile for miracles. i pray and hope that everything will work out and that Nie will recover beyond your family's most audacious hopes!
That was beautiful!!!! Topher really has a great sprit you can tell. Thank you for posting this.
I am so happy to hear the good news. Thank you so much for sharing their story as well as updates on their progress, it is truly inspiring. Her and her family have been in my thoughts and prayers since I heard of their situation. I have seen God work many miracles in my life and I know that he can do the same for this family.
What beautiful words.
While not LDS myself, I have a great number of friends who are and I've always said they are some of the kindest, most family centered people I know.
Your family illustrates that yet again!
Thanks again for sharing your lives with us.
Cheers!
Jamie
Beautiful...especially the last part.
Just wanted to know I found your site through Decorno and am sending love your way.
Thank you for sharing such a personal letter with the world of blogging! You are an amazing, inspiring and uplifting family.
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