Two years ago this month our dog died.
I was never a pet fanatic, never one who'd foresee myself crying over a lost animal, but when my dog died I fell apart. So did my husband. We cried for days on end. Until we moved, we never stopped anticipating seeing our Ralph waiting for us on the back porch. I could've blamed it on the spice of a hormonal pregnancy, but either way it was really sad. He was the only baby I had known, the only being to appreciate me as a mother.
Recognizing our grief patterns, my helpful cousin Katie offered to give me an early ultrasound.
"Come see your baby. It will help you feel better." She promised.
So we did.
And I had never been more nervous in my life. Not for any recital, or mission, or marriage. Not because I was anxious about the gender, or about the health of the fetus. I was nervous I had made the whole pregnancy up in my brain, just because I wanted it that bad. It was plausible to think Katie would take that wand, squeeze blue jelly all over my slightly protruding belly and find nothing but a bowl of black soup in my uterus.
But no. A baby appeared.
And she was right. When I saw that being moving and stretching and giving us a thumbs up sign my heart had found a replacement for the hole Ralphy left. A replacement that expanded until it took over my entire heart. Oh the miracle of modern technology!
I was mother to a human.
---
As I write this post, a second baby is punching around inside of me. I am almost twenty weeks. In this stage of pregnancy the going question is, "Do you know the gender?" --an inquisition added to the repertoire of pregnancy pondering in the past twenty years. Do you know the gender? Are you going to find out? What do think it is? All questions I've asked to others in my position. It is Ultrasound Season again for me.
I've been asking the Lord for some insights this time around, and I feel differently with this pregnancy. I know I have a tremendous amount of options given to me for the direct purpose of a successful pregnancy, delivery and postpartum period. From medical procedures and miraculous ultrasounds to alternative methods, I recognize them all as gifts from God. I will accept them all as good, I will be grateful for what options I choose.
But with this pregnancy I have decided to choose less options. I am learning to find the mothering instincts inside of me in a different way. The Lord is teaching my spirit in terms that my soul can understand, and the more I let go of options, the happier I feel. Happier, lighter, better. This is for me, not everyone, but yes, definitely for me.
So have I heard my baby's heart beat? Yes. But not with an instrument.
Will I get an ultrasound? Maybe, but probably not.
But it doesn't mean I haven't seen my baby.
***in keeping with photo series on the last post, this is our former dog Ralph, Utah Lake, dead of winter.
73 Pieces of Opinion:
Congratulations once again! Lovely post. x
your post is great! you know, u had the impression i read some book but not a blog!
my congratulations with a baby! it is wonderful!!
http://david-dyoubelieveinmysticism.blogspot.com/
how beautiful!
not knowing the gender till birth is AWESOME.
my birth and postpartum were rushed and abrasive and i didn't have a woman to help. i am praying i'll be brave enough to stand up for myself and do things differently next time too.
beautiful post, Courtney. This seems a much more personal way to get to know your baby.
I think it is fun to wait and see what the gender is too. I have done that a couple times. But I would strongly suggest an ultrasound for medical purposes. You can do what you want, but it would be unforgivable if something went wrong that you could have prevented with an ultrasound.
I've been blessed with 4 children, each a different experience, but with each one we NEVER knew the sex. We tried with one - but she was too busy to let us know. (my husband was gone for that delivery and I wanted him to know what it was first, oh well)
The point of my comment - Amidst the intensity of childbirth, hearing It's a..., could be the most invigorating moment of life as a mother, and life with he/she begins! You chose wisely!
Good for you! It is so much fun to wait.
And I think that, unless highly recommended by your care provider, ultrasounds are pointless, and I avoid them if I can. They really don't detect much, anyway. I know a woman who had a stillbirth, and the baby had all sorts of physical problems that were never picked up on ultrasound--leading me to think they're even more pointless.
Anyway, good for you for letting your instincts take over and doing this the way you think is right.
Not that you're seeking approval, but I still say good for you in your new approach to this baby. I opted out of the ultrasound option myself, and as I wait out the few more weeks until my baby comes I continue to have great peace about my choice. I'm sure that you made that decision based on your own research and intuitions, knowing that there is very, very little that an ultra-sound would tell you that you could actually do something about before the birth (except worry, but that doesn't seem very fun). Continue in your confidence and trusting in those leadings!
Four of the most joyful words I ever shouted: "HA! It's a girl!"
Not knowing was wonderful. I did have an ultrasound - I needed SOMETHING to convince me that there was a reason for all the illness, and it was indeed a beautiful miracle to see her in there.
But not knowing always seemed right. It made my pregnancy mine, something quiet between me and my baby. Even if people wanted to know what was in there, I didn't have an answer. And I liked it that way.
And I could feel her and hear her. Without any help.
Congratulations on your pregnancy! My son was born 9 months ago today with spina bifida and we did pick it up on ultrasound. The last 20 weeks of my pregnancy were spent worrying like crazy...I say good for you for taking your pregnancy into your own hands. There wasn't a thing that I could do to help my son before he was born and the worrying took away from all of the "joyful" experiences. You are the mother, and know what is best for you and your baby. Congratulations again!!
aawwwww, that such a lovely way to look at pregnancy! i am so glad for you! my dog died a couple of years ago, :( but happy baby :)
I LOVED not knowing on both of my pregnacies. In my ultrasound (with my second) the tech dropped a hint and of course was right in the end. No judgements either way, but if you do decide to do the ultrasound make sure you "overkill" the not wanting to know or have hints part :)
so beautiful this post is, what a deeper sense you have with this little soul. My goodness could it get any better? Hugs~Donna from Massachusetts
our dog Trapper was like your Ralph. Our first "child", a being to whom I was "mommy" before my own children came. He was with me through rough times, heart-breaking times, always knowing when to crowd his 100 lb. self onto my lap between sobs. He was my love.
He died when our first child was six months old. It all happened suddenly, and the decision to euthanize him was the only one to make (I do thank God for making that clear). Both my husband and I cried; I spent a week creating a photo album dedicated to Trapper while my longed-for human son crawled around the floor next to me. The process of making that album was so cathartic and wonderfully healing. I'm not really a dog person, but I was very much my Trapper's person. He was a big, blond, happy-go-lucky, shedding, Golden Retriever. Now I've got three kids and the LAST thing I want is a dog in the house! But oh! I dearly loved my Trapper and my husband did too.
I love how life and its experiences mold us and allow us to approach each new event with wisdom gained from the previous one. It's good to be able to reflect on all that. (Dog loss; pregnancy; whatever it is.)
I am scared to listen to my natural mothering when it come to pregnancy and child birth. I wish I could get over it. To be honest the whole process terrifies me. Afterward I feel like a natural, so I guess I should take what I can get :)
vanessa from inevergrewup.net
That is really touching! There is much to be learned from you!
I will say that if you don't want to know the sex of the baby, make sure and tell EVERYONE that. We waited for it to be a surprise for 9 months, then the resident doctor did a quick ultrasound when I was in labor and said, he looks great. HE looks great. He? I told myself she was generalizing by calling the baby a he, but she was right. It was a he. And he was perfect!
i'm due in 2 weeks and we don't find out what we're having. it's so much more exciting!!
I miss this stage in my life. I didn't think I would, but something about turning 40 makes me yearn for the young motherhood again.
Not knowing the gender of the baby is the best. I've done it twice and I'll do it 100 more times.
I think it would be awesome to wait until birth to find out the gender of your baby. It's one of the last real, true surprises!
However, can I just suggest something? To have an ultrasound to check on the health of the baby? I say this because if I had not had an ultrasound with our first child, we would not have known to plan the birth so she could be directly transported to a children's hospital. She had a very serious birth defect. She would have passed away minutes after birth. Instead, because of quick, essential medical care, we had 3 1/2 months with her. We got to see her smile and kick her feet. We got to know her before it was time for her to go home.
It's just a suggestion, of course, but I don't hesitate to share her story because I have learned and gained so much from being her mother. I wish you all the best!
Have you guys checked out cjane's community lately? SO MUCH FUN!! Go take a peek!
Here's the link:
http://theblogfrog.com/psearch/Community.aspx?blogID=1568
I am so happy you are not finding out the gender of the baby. I did not find out with both of my babies (it must be the Brit in me), and everyone thought I was crazy. I am glad you are showing that it can be done and how wonderful it is not knowing.
Congratulations.
Cool! We will not have an ultrasound for our next baby (when ever that is...) unless medically indicated. I love when my clients are surprised! I'm just as excited as they are. :)
This is fabulous. I have had 3 homebirths and have loved having the less is more approach. I love taking each birth as it comes and listening to the Spirit to know how each baby needs to be born. I salute you for listening.
As much as I agree with less is more, I also feel it is so important to have an ultrasound to make sure that everything is forming correctly so preventative measures can be taken if needed.
Enjoy every moment of your pregnancy. Mine will be coming to an end somewhere within the next 2-4 weeks, and while I'm so excited to finally have this baby, I'm always a bit sad at the thought of not being pregnant anymore. That magical feeling of baby swirling around, those kicks, and punches...pure joy!
my cat was put to sleep when I was 22...I had had him since I was 7. It was heart wrenching, I've never sobbed harder in my life (the thought that he didn't know what was happening to him broke my heart)...I think I even cried harder than when my father passed away (because let's be honest, that was more of a "I'll see you soon.")
So this post sings to my heart. And I, as you once did, am aching for that gift from God. To have something to baby again, to give to and to love me back. In the meantime, the hubbs will have to cut it.
As always, so beautiful.
I have 7 children, and with some we found out, and some we didn't. All were very enjoyable experiences. I was especially grateful for ultrasounds during my 5th because of complications in the pregnancy. I had over 20 with him. Each kick, roll, punch, and glimpse of him was more reassuring than worrisome. I always knew he'd be fine, even when intubated in NICU.
He was also one of our surprises.
One year ago today I had a miscarriage. It was the hardest thing I ever experienced. Today is also Maddie (The Sphors are Multiplying, do you read that blog? you should!) Birthday and her mom has to go through today without her baby girl.
I'm sorry for you dog but I'm happy for your new addition
Congratulations! I think surprise births are the best...as in the surprise of gender not the surprise of actually giving birth...hopefully that's expected.
Good for you. A mother's instinct is a very powerful thing.
I was the same way with our little one and the first ultrasound. We had waited for so long for a baby that I wasn't sure I hadn't just made it up (despite the NUMEROUS pregnancy test results and instant weight gain =)). It was such an amazing experience to see that little heart going strong and know that that little life was there.
I am way to impatient to wait until the birth to find out the sex, but I say more power to you if that's what you decide to do!
My sweet first born Yellow Lab passed away in July of this year. She taught me so much in her almost twelve years with me, and I am grateful for each of her lessons. I always wonder if she will be waiting for me on the other side because I need to tell her how much I love her and how much I appreciated her unconditional love through the tough times. My kids are better little people having been exposed to such a great dog. We all grow from the little moments in life, and I know I am better for having her sweet soul with me through learning how to be a better parent and person. Congrats on taking charge of your pregnancy. I think I speak for most when I say your baby is so blessed to be entering such a remarkable family.
Cousin Katie! She was my ultrasound tech when we found out our baby had no heartbeat last January. I had to have 3 ultrasounds and it always happened to be her. I loved her! It was such a hard time, but I always liked going in to see her. She made me promise to come back when we got pregnant again, but I haven't been able to get in to see her. Hi Katie, if you read this!
We were (apparently) pregnant with one, until the ultrasound at 4 1/2 months revealed twins. A big surprise for sure, but better than getting that surprise at 9 months....
What do you recommend for someone who is having a hard time conceiving? your advice would be much appreciated! Also, a big congratulations to you!!
I felt that way too, with my second. Though I ended up being glad that I did have an ultrasound with him (I opted for an amnio with him that I didn't have with his brother) and I was sooooooooooo convinced that he was a she. To the point that I said to the nurse "It's fine to see the sex I already know it's a girl" and then the baby did a flip and we both said "WHOA!" and well, he was not a girl!! :)
Just wanted to share my personal experience about why I am so grateful for ultrasounds. At about 22 weeks I had an ultrasound and the doctor could tell right away that our son had Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia...CDH (more common than I ever knew). That meant that his body had developed with a hole in his diaphragm and our son's stomach and intestines were in his chest cavity shifting over his heart and not leaving ample room for his lungs to develop.
We were completely shocked. We had just had a perfectly healthy baby girl who wasn't even a year old and we never thought something like this would happen. My little guy was super healthy in the womb...kickin like crazy...he didn't need his lungs quite yet. Talmage, was born in Philadelphia (we were living in Virginia), a hospital we researched out thoroughly beforehand and we felt very good about our choice of surgeons. When I delivered my little guy he was whisked away to a room 10 feet away where a team of surgeons was waiting to save his life.
They saved his life and he is a perfectly healthy little 2 year old. I am so grateful for the medical technology that allowed him to stay with us in this life.
I am totally not against natural birth and half my cousins and lots of my friends have done it successfully and have had really amazing experiences. I am not trying to scare you, but after this experience that I have had, I have felt that I have a responsibility to be a voice of awareness for this disease.
Love your blog:)
just my personal thoughts, i have a friend who is a health freak, they did not want any ultrasound or anything of the kind to keep the baby safe, she just delivered at 27 weeks, a 2.2 lb. baby. she is doing o.k. but i would rather have an ultrasound and know what is going on than have a very preemie baby you don't have to find out the sex. congratulations and have a wonderful pregnancy!!
Hey cjane! I had 3 separate ultrasounds (10wks, 20wks, 32 wks) for both of my babies, I am so thankful for the options we have these days!!!
My friend's doctor only does one at 20 weeks. That was when she found out it was twins for them! They had no clue. She had only heard the heartbeat up to that point. (She thought it was only one heartbeat.) It was a shocking discovery, as the pregnancy was a surprise. She was thankful they had time to prepare for two. She delivered fraternal girls in May- both healthy and able to go home with Mama from the hospital.
I am so excited for you two and your new baby. The Chief is going to eb the bestest big brother ever!
I didn't have ultra sounds, and both pregnancies were a surprise. We also didn't name our babies for 30 days--that is how long California gave to file a bith certificate. It was great getting to know them before attaching a name. They are Dylan Edward, and Zachary Clinotn-Elonzo. And never have there been two boys who look just like their name. Beautiful. Our daughter came to us with a name, whcih the boys proptly changed to a nickname so we could name her too. Perfect.
Are you going to register someone? Somewhere I can go to shop for BabyK? Please. Pretty Please.
blessings, mari
You are amazing! I love your blog and I read it every time you update it. If you ever need any family pictures or preggo/baby pictures, I live like right down the street from you. And oddly enough, every time I saw a "Steve Clark" poster I thought of you!
http://stacythiotphotography.blogspot.com/
Yeah to you and Chup for not needing to know the gender of your baby now. I have three sons and for each we did not want to know the gender and thoughtfully chose a boy's name or a girl's name. For each one I chose to have one very quick u/s and it was so important for us to not to know the gender. In fact it was also very important that during the birth, no one except Hubs or I would say if we had a boy or a girl. There will be many stories you will hear or how an u/s helped medically but I believe there are more in which they caused unnecessary stress, and also led to more u/s's. There is no proof that many u/s are perfectly safe. Or all the other interventions. I can't wait to hear more!
It's a little bit funny...in reading about YOUR dog, it reminded me of something I wrote about mine.
http://teachinfourth.blogspot.com/2007/11/living-years.html
There are days I still miss Grizzly...
I'm due April 10 and really look forward to your pregnancy posts. Thanks so much for sharing these glimpses of your journey with all of us.
I know your sister (nienie) had a home birth (more than one I believe?) and so I'm curious if that's what you are planning? I hope this doesn't incite criticism from other commenters in case that's what you are planning, but I'm planning a home birth myself and I think I'm secretly hoping that you are as well. If that is the case, I look forward to hearing more about it (whether before or after the fact). I also, of course, look forward to hearing more about your birth, no matter where it is. :)
I hope you'll keep sharing more even when the criticism rolls in for doing things in an unconventional manner.
For me the ultrasounds and poking and prodding are more about the attention I get than anything, but by the end of my pregnancy I hate my doctors anyway. The next time I'm getting a midwife and will probably do things in a similar way. Great insight.
Congratulations on another baby!! I had my second baby at home, in the water, and I loved it! I used Hypnobirthing and I feel both the water and Hypnobirthing helped me very much. My favorite part of the whole thing though was I had her at 5 in the morning. My oldest daughter woke up at 7 and my husband went in to get her and said, "Your baby sister is here!" She was so excited, she jumped out of her crib and ran to see her new sister in my room! She was so happy, and it was wonderful that we were right there, in the comfort of our own home! Good luck with everything!!
5 of my 6 babies we did not know the gender until birth. It was wonderful that way. I would do it that way all over again. I feel like many people miss out on a very special thing by finding out ahead of time. I hope you continue to feel blessed by each choice you make!
I love that we have all the options that we do, that we get to choose the path to motherhood that works for us. 25 years ago it was a different story. Good luck on whatever path works for you and yours.
We are going the same route for the first time. This is not our first baby, it is our 5th, but I have always wanted to try and see what it would be like as a surprise.
I do enjoy the ultrasound itself, since it comes before the fluttering of the baby and it is a confirmation, to at least my eyes.
On that note, ultrasounds are not perfect. We had one daughter with Turners Syndrome and nothing was detected by ultrasound (she died shortly after birth). Nothing would have changed that outcome, that is all the time she was meant to be here for. I do treasure every picture of her and that includes the ultrasound pictures. Another daughter was born without a kidney, which was also not picked up by ultrasound and was not discovered until she was 3 1/2. She is fine, but it did come to a shock to her parents.
I have felt all along that this one is a boy but the doctor keeps referring to it as a girl because of the heart rate. We will have to see....we can't wait to see.
Congrats on your pregnancy!
As a crusader for natural birth, I have to say great choice! I just had my third natural birth with a midwife--what an empowering experience! I've loved hearing my husband say, "It's a..." What a great surprise! (We did get the 20-week ultrasound every time, but we were very clear with the tech that we DID NOT want to know the gender.)
This is how I sum up my birth experiences: No pain, no distress, just complete relaxation and trust because I surrendered my mind and body to the birth process.
I truly feel that "less is more" where pregnancy and birth are concerned and am thrilled when I hear of other women who are educating themselves about birth options instead of simply following the crowd. Good luck!
Hey happy parents, whatever you decide is probably the right decision for you. I didn't think an ultrasound was anything but to make sure the baby was ok. We did it 3 times and all 3 times, my kid wouldn't let us see what or who she was. And she's STILL a big joker today. I love reading about your joys, your faith, your religion (v.interesting) and also how confident you are in yourself. Thx so much.
My children are 22, 19 & 15. No ultrasounds. Granted, they weren't very popular with the first two, but with my last pregnancy they were gaining ground. We (or maybe us I) decided, even after the dr. encouraged us, to not have one.
I'm glad we didn't. Our Brad was quite a surprise. I really thought he was going to be a she.
Bonsoir Cjane,
Je crois que tu parles français ?
Je suis suédoise et habite en France depuis plus de 20 ans maintenant. Ton blog est un vrai bonbon ! Je goutte un peu tous les soirs, et tes paroles me mets toujours de bonne humeur.
Je ne pas l'habitude de faire des commentaires mais je voulais seulement te dire, ce que beacoup de lectrices ton déjà dit, l'écographie (l'utrasound) peut être vraiment utile. Ma fille ainée a aussi pu être sauvée grâce à cet examen. Pourquoi prendre des risques? même s'ils sont minimes ?
Je t'embrasse
Johanna
Do you find out the sex of your baby? Discuss in Cjane's community!
http://theblogfrog.com/psearch/ViewThread.aspx?threadID=6203&blogID=1568
I find out b/c of my history of pre-mature labor, or I would wait. But I am so pleased that this time, my hubby can give me my shots at home and I have had far less trips or ultrasounds. Its a boy, so I need to go full term for him. But I am thinking of hiring a doula. And I have learned to knit since the last one, so I am knitting this boy soft lovelies. Best wishes for yours:) I know you will get the answers He knows you need.
i meant to comment on your post awhile ago about what offends you...and then this post reminded me (don't worry i'm not about to say anything mean to you!!! although you might be wondering)...
i am 32 weeks pregnant right now and have just made the decision to have a homebirth (i just changed from an OB to a midwife and am really loving the difference in care!). something felt different this time - i have questioned and researched more than i did with my first (and i even felt i researched with him) but my views have definitely changed or really just evolved. it has been a really spiritual journey that has led me to this decision and to have so many people doubt it (within my own family - we aren't really broadcasting the fact that we are having a homebirth because so many people think it's crazy) is what "offends" me at times (really the negativity just makes me sad). it hurts me that they question my ability to make good decisions.
i thought that was related to this post so i would share it. i'm not sure if you're having a homebirth this time or not (did you last time? i don't even know...) but whatever you are doing, you are doing what's best for you and nobody can know that except for you & chup. i think the less is more approach to childbirth is definitely awesome and it's one that i'm taking this time around too! can't wait to see your beautiful baby :)
I really love this post. Just a beautiful, personal approach to bringing a child into the world. There is so much to consider in terms of care that sometimes it fogs the simplicity and purity of the mother/child relationship. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this.
I love your blog... you are great at putting words together and making me as a reader shake my head in understanding! Best wishes with this pregnancy and baby :)
What a lovely post, and I hope your plans work out for you.
I couldn't imagine not having an ultrasound! I don't mean that to sound rude, because obviously its your choice and very brave of you to share it with us. I think it would just worry me, if I was pregnant that is all.
I cannot believe your already almost 20 weeks! Where has the time gone?
Hello :)
I read the comment from 'Crissy' and I will have to strongly disagree. In fact, her comment shows great ignorance.
My 3rd daughter was diagnosed with a birth defect called Hydrocephalus or 'water on the brain' during a routine ultrasound. Because of that knowledge I was able to deliver her in a hospital (2 hours away from my home) where a pediatric neurosurgeon could was ready to perform surgery shortly after her birth.
If I hadn't found out early, she might not have survived. Also, a vaginal delivery would have put an incredible amount of pressure on her head, and she might not have survived that either. So we were able to plan a c-section ahead of time.
The things I found out because of an ultrasound saved her life.
Sometimes modern medicine is a miracle and a blessing. And there is nothing wrong with accepting it.
Best wishes with your pregnany :)
I found out at my 20 week ultrasound that I was not expecting one baby, but two. I think finding out that surprise in the delivery room would have done me in! I'm all for not caring about the gender and being surprised, but at the same time for medical reasons I definitely think having one ultrasound at 20 weeks is important. Because my twins were identical in the same sack, I needed to have ultrasounds twice weekly to monitor them and their amniotic fluid levels. Ultrasounds can save babies lives. They really can. They even did an ultrasound in between the babies vaginal deliveries to make sure that baby #2 was all lined up to follow his brother. I loved seeing my little ones so much with my biweekly ultrasounds. Of course, they are much cuter in person.
I love your blog and I'm overjoyed that you are having a baby! YAY! What a lucky little one-- or ones ;-) You never know. Twins could happen to anyone.
I think that is great, but just be careful.Ultrasounds are not just about finding out the sex. When I had an ultrasound with my last daughter, they found a cyst in the placenta. It grew bigger within the months, and I had to be induced 3 weeks early, becuase it could have stopped the blood flow to the baby.
I am a natural birth advocate and a soon-to-be-certified doula (but I'm not a natural nazi - do what is best for you and safest for the baby. And be educated! for heaven sakes! Make your own decisions!). I love all things birth, especially natural birth. I love it! Natural birth is empowering. I think the idea of not knowing my baby's gender is so exciting. Next time, I really want it to be a surprise (gotta talk the Mr. into it) and I'm doing it in a birth center, if the babe is down with the idea. (how was that for showing you my birth merit badges?)
The only reservation I have about not getting an ultrasound is that I've had multiple friends where the ultrasound saved the babies life (for real, I'm not just saying that for scare. because of the ultrasound, they saw health issues in the fetus that only certain certified hospitals were equipped to handle). Some of the women still could have gone natural (one did), but they had the blessing of technology too.
Follow you gut (the spirit), of course. But one of the things I love about birthing today (even in America where saying you want to give birth naturally gets you a lot of confused looks) is that we can have a wonderful marriage of natural birth and technology.
And the award for longest comment goes to Abbie. :) Thank you.
C Jane, I hope you take the "cautionary tale" comments into consideration. I also know of several cases where a baby's life was saved due to an ultrasound detecting a condition mid-way through the pregnancy. Please don't be negligent. You'll never forgive yourself if, heaven forbid, something goes wrong.
just wanted to second what Rebecca and Abbie said- without diagnostic ultrasounds several of my little ones would have gone through serious unnecessary trauma. Going natural shouldn't= being negligent.
This all seems so ridiculous. Isn't the point to get the baby here safe and sound? Focusing all your attention on the method you get them here or "when" you find out seems so ridiculous. I agree with Lisa. Modern Medicine should be looked at as a blessing and a miracle, rather than a curse.
I found out with my baby at 20 weeks and I will do it again. I had an epidural and I will do it again. These things don't make me appreciate my daughter any less or make me any less in touch with myself or her. It's an asinine way of thinking. In fact, I choose to focus on her now rather than looking back at her birth and my pregnancy with her to determine my relationship with her.
Do you know how many people would have killed to have modern technologies such as ultrasounds to discover problems early on that could be remedied before or just after the baby is born? There's like this new generation of mommies from on high who are throwing all of these things out the window for the sake of appearing more motherly. They're focusing on the wrong thing. It's self-indulgent. Who cares when you find out what you're having and who the heck cares how you get the baby here? It's all of no consequence in the end. The focus should be on the baby, not on you.
It sounds like from the comments that there are a lot of people out there who think you are great and enjoy reading your blog! I have to agree with those that have said that modern medicine is a blessing, after all MODERN medicine is what saved your sister and brother-in-laws lives- without it they would not be here today. What a blessing to be having another baby when you have waited so long for motherhood. Be smart about your decisions, let the spirit guide you, there is so much they can do for babies with problems these days- is it really a risk worth taking? In my opinion absolutly not. But our free agency is what this life is all about, there are many people who commented on this blog who differ in opinion, I think this goes to show that there are so many people who care about you.
Just my 2 cents!
God bless you and your family!
I just gotta say that the ultrasounds are my FAVORITE part of being pregnant. I was high risk with my second, and thus had to get a stress test and an ultrasound every week during my last 2 months. Necessary? Probably not. Helpful? Not really, although it calmed my fear that she had the cord wrapped around her neck. Totally fun? You betcha. Every week I looked forward to it, like it was a little party with my baby. I would wave to my little girl, and just drink in the images of her. I couldn't get enough.
Once I had to have a renal ultrasound that had nothing to do with the baby, and after we were done, the tech whispered, "Let's look at your baby, kay? I can't document anything, but I'm just dying to see her!" I hungrily agreed, and we spent a happy 10 minutes examining her perfect little body together.
So count me in the pro-ultrasound group. I just think there isn't anything more spectacular than seeing your baby safe and warm inside your body before he or she makes an entrance into the cold world. Of course, I'm also the medical geek who, with both my kids, would sit with my stethoscope on my bare belly for hours, just listening to the soft "whoosh whoosh" of my baby's heartbeat. Seriously, nothing better. But I'm just weird like that.
Don't you wanna make sure there's not 2, or maybe 3 in there? (I'm just sayin'.)
I have done that a couple times. But I would strongly suggest an ultrasound for medical purposes.
Work From Home India
This seems a much more personal way to get to know your baby.
Work From Home India
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