Wednesday, September 8, 2010

c jane's Perspective & The End


I take after my mother, I fall in love with people. Easily.

And like my mother, I am a desperate fool for people who make me laugh. I swoon over clever statements and relish in well-played punch lines. Funny, happy people make a an adoring puppy out of me. I am like a teenager with a poster on my wall and a bad case of Bieber Fever--there is no remedy. I am a fan for life.

An expanded weekend with such people by an offering sea awakened all sorts of places inside of me. I remembered the part of me who I really like. I was again that girl who falls in love with people because her heart isn't full of responsibilities.


I loved Biblemom for her satisfied demeanor. One night I actually spent time wondering about how pleasant it would be to wake up as her baby and see her morning face full of light and bright eyes. Lucky children, Biblemom's. I loved her for nursing tandem with me, and bonding over bodily baby feedings. She is a calm, gifted woman who was the first to dance in the ocean. And I loved her bikini, I hope she doesn't mind me saying that.

I loved her husband, The Piano Man for his unfailing cleverness. He didn't speak as much as the rest of us, but when his mouth opened a great intelligent and comedic quip would escape, and for hours I'd be laughing. And when we went out to brunch he was the one who had a plate full of hash and a side of hair. He was so cool about it, didn't make a big deal but he did make us perfect strawberry shakes later that night. And most of all, I loved his non-judgmental style, he is comfortable and modest too.

I loved watching their marriage mostly because I had just met them on this trip. They are wonderfully kind and respectful to each other, he played with the baby and she made fresh salsa and when the baby started to fuss, she took the baby and he finished the salsa. I loved that. And when I look at their photo above I feel enormously sentimental.


I loved La Doux because she makes me feel safe. I love her poise and posture, the way she wrings her hands together when she is thinking. I love that she reached out to me to be my friend several years ago and I love that we were the co-creators of this newly found friendship group. I love her capability, her honesty, the faith she has in me and others. I love her point of view and uncanny sense of observation. I love that she can talk me into or out of just about anything--and this is where I put the *wink wink* inside the post and make everyone curious.

I loved The Mayor because he is always the spice, the best part of any outing. He is perhaps the funniest person I know (perhaps tied with Topher). I love his deprecation, I love how he wears his artistic frustrations on his sleeve, I love how comfortable he is in loving other people too.Being an audience to his story telling is one of the best aspects of my life, there is no end to the surprises--like this trip where he told us about singing a duet on stage with Natalie Merchant of 10,000 Maniacs at several huge concerts when he was a student at USC. I love that he had never told us that one before, even though we've known him for years. And I especially loved hearing the live duet on his Ipod later.

I loved their marriage because it is sexy. Can I say that too?


I loved Cousin like I always have loved her. I love her for her bravery and firm sense of self. She has a strong, sweet Pepsi-loving heart. I loved over-hearing a phone conversation with her distraught daughter, Cousin prayed with her over the phone and told her to look forward to the next day when she'd have a field trip and donuts in her lunch. Isn't that all we need in life? I love Cousin because she is a remarkable mother and I can appreciate what a gift that is these days.

I love The Cleanser for laughing. He is funny, but he is even more funny because he appreciates other's humor. He has talent oozing out of his being and even through my jealousy I love him for that too. I was there in his past which makes me love his future. And I love how he introduced me to Katy Perry's California Gurls. Actually, I am not quite sure I love him for that as I've been singing "we'll melt your Popsicle" all day long. And he is not going to believe this, but I love him for cleansing on vacation.

I love their marriage because Cousin is the only person in the world that The Cleanser could've married, and he knows it. Plus, they populate the earth with children who have dreamy faces.


I love Chup for as many reasons as grains of sand I swatted out of my suitcase this morning when we arrived home. But maybe I love him most right now because he frees me up so I can love others. He doesn't crowd me out with jealousies or distrust, he knows that when I am full of love he gets the most of it. No matter how high the heaping of love, he will always be the top.

Plus, he is funny too.

If seven thirty-somethings (and one forty-something, but who is counting?) with lives full of children, careers and church responsibilities could plan a perfect vacation it would look like this: sunny days on a beachfront terrace with nothing to do but sit and talk. Occasionally eat, but mostly sit and talk. Something they cannot do otherwise without interruption.

A perfect vacation would look like this: Our Couple's Retreat.

*black and white photos of the couples by The Cleanser, aka Jed Wells.












I am c jane and I met up with two of my favorite bloggers on this trip as well. I am going to tell those stories soon.
contact me: cjanemail@gmail.com

53 Pieces of Opinion:

Lynda Halliger-Otvos said...

Sounds like the perfect weekend; I am so glad that you and Chup and Ever could relax into it.

Anonymous said...

The retreat was an interesting concept. But i come here to read your writing! Colonel Mustard and Mrs. Peacock, not so much.

Briana said...

those are beautiful pictures to go along with a beautiful post. each picture alone says so much - there's so much personality and character in them.

sounds like a GREAT vacation!

hello*lucky*holly said...

Dreamy with a capital D.
x
H

edenland said...

C Jane, this has been the most fascinating, wonderful, thought-provoking series of posts. Thank you to you and your guest bloggers. Wow.

I wonder how many people you have inspired, around this tiny globe of ours ... to take time out and renew or perhaps even begin some wonderful friendships like the ones you displayed here.

It makes me want to gather up some people and do a road trip of my own. Just do it.

Love deeply,
Eden XO

Katherine said...

That is lovely :) You have such a way with words, cjane.

meeks said...

In my mind I have already started to figure out Joe I can make our own couple's retreat work!

Beautiful posts by all "the players".....and the photos are dreamy gorgeous!!!!!

Karen said...

What a beautiful, beautiful perspective. Lucky girl.

Sarah Jane said...

Oh, sounds so, so good. Glad the stars aligned!

OKTownsends said...

I have read your blog for awhile but have never commented. I should have sent you to say hello to my nephew serving in the St. Louis mission. If you like funny you would love him. But today I had to comment because your first picture, Biblemom, is one of my most favorite people. She was my neighbor. I was her young woman leader. She was in high school. I am not surprised that you love her. It was easy for me as well.

Tana said...

I loved all of these couples and the blogger who introduced them.

Leah said...

I'm so happy you had this lovely opportunity! You are just a doll.

The Boob Nazi said...

Sounds like a good vacation.

Anonymous said...

Wahoo.

Doty Family said...

Gorgeous pictures! What a neat experience!

Alexa Mae said...

beautiful court! this made me slightly jealous. okay, a lot jealous. what a perfect weekend.

that picture of you and chup-- i died and went to heaven...

Laura said...

Such a fun trip! Glad you all had such a good time. Now a question: Did all those men grow beards just for the trip? Or are they like my man, who never shaves on vacation...
;o)

tharker said...

It sounds like the perfect weekend getaway. I LOVE the pictures!


It's funny how before I became a mother, a vacation had to be filled to the brim with activity after activity. Now, I want nothing more than to just read a good book next to the pool and visit with good friends. Oh, and throw some good food in there. Yep, I think about sums it up.

So glad you all had a good time!

Alissa said...

Loved that positive posting....and those photos were just spectacular!!

Anonymous said...

Courtney.
I love the way you write, I love how you see the beauty in others, I love your grace and supportive demeanour.
But most of all, I love the way you love. (and that includes the way you write about your love for your Chup.)
Toronto Jen

the emily said...

I have GOT to stop reading these posts. I'm so jealous I'm drooling. Is that even a thing jealous people do? Well, I do it when I'm jealous. and I want a friend with a beach house so I can go on a vacation where I just sit and look at the ocean and talk and laugh. Because I need a good laugh, see jane (heh heh).

Ann said...

I love those photos!

Anonymous said...

i really loved this post. it not only makes me smile, it makes my heart sing. so glad you had a great time at the retreat, c jane!

Brittney said...

"But maybe I love him most right now because he frees me up so I can love others. He doesn't crowd me out with jealousies or distrust, he knows that when I am full of love he gets the most of it."

I am the wife of a teacher, and I sometimes feel like I'm playing Chup's role. It's hard sometimes to realize how important your spouse is in the lives of so many people when you, yourself, could be considered a nobody in comparison. Your quote makes me want to do my best to support him though because I know he puts me in his #1 slot like you put Chup in your #1 slot.

pollydove said...

Wow ... incredible photos. Sounds like a memorable, wonderfully enriching retreat. Lucky.

{april kennedy} said...

Oh I loved reading your thoughts on each couple and admired how much you really did get to know them!

I do love life too and love meeting and getting to know new people. Everyone has a story to tell and it is usually amazing and inspiring...if we would just make time to listen!

I need a Couple's Retreat!

Butternutsage said...

I just sighed at the end of this...perfect prose and perfect vacation and I can hear your soul renewed in all things.Hugs~Donna from Massachusetts

zuzuspetals said...

....So lovely, I wanted to cry just a little. Makes my heart feel like it might just break right on out of this chest of mine and sing a little ditty. Thank you C Jane. You're a gift.

Niki said...

Your writing inspires my own...thanks for that, and for your blog, I am an avid follower (first time commenter.)I read your posts everyday, and when there isn't a new one, I pick something from your archives. Your retreat makes me want to create my own with the people I know and love and the people I want to know and love better. Glad your retreat was everything you wanted, needed, and didn't know in the beginning it would be!

Shauna said...

I am now inspired to do my own couples retreat, but with just me and my hubby. We have our third child due in April, so of course it will have to wait, but I am definatly going to have to get away with my sweetheart to just sit, talk and relax.

Thank you.

Sydney said...

Cjane-
That black and white picture of you is beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. YOU are absolutely beautiful. I love how it brings out your freckles, I have freckles too. :)

Geo said...

Here, I'll share my long-standing version of this dream with you, and we'll see who gets to it first—a couples' retreat by the shore, at a lighthouse. Now that lighthouses are generally automated, the old lighthousekeepers' homes are up for rental. And there are some swoony places to hole up in Oregon. Oh, my.

I'm glad you had a beautiful getaway. I'm glad you are beautiful.

And those are some amazing couples' shots. Everyone looks relaxed, refreshed, and full of love.

Notes from Holly St. said...

what a beautiful post...I'm sure your vacation buddies are so touched with your assessment of their characters. I love the retreat idea...will have to try it with our group of friends sometime!

The Montoyas said...

I want to be part of your group! What a beautiful group you make! Inside and out it seems.

Kate said...

This got me *that* much more excited for my couples retreat! We're going to Hawaii for 10 days the day after tomorrow. I'm beside myself with giddiness, and ready for a refreshing, renewing retreat.

I can't wait to take my Mindy Gledhill cd to the beach and just float along to it.

xoxo to you and your family!

Azúcar said...

I just want to talk about that picture of Morgan and how you got to see her. Is that bad?

Damaris said...

you are one of the luckiest women I know. I think you know it too.

The LaLa said...

I loved the perspectives of the other retreat-minded members. Beautiful writing, beautifully different personalities. That was a true vacation -- no place to demand you visit and no relatives either! Except your cousin, and your husband, and your baby. Well, you brought them along.

Vicky said...

Beautifully written; joyfully read!

Jocelyn said...

LOVE the pic of you and Chup. LOVE IT!

Carrot Jello said...

I should say something about how I love you, and I love how you love, and how I love love, but I can't.
I just keep thinking about that first picture and how it looks like you're standing in front of a back drop of the beach.
Like you just faked a beach retreat because you couldn't come up with any other blog ideas. Which, if that is the case, I think you are brilliant.
(And even if you didn't, I think you're great anyway)
Why, I think I'm going to make up my own little retreat post and throw in some great friends, good conversation, and fabulous food.
And I won't forget funny conversations either.
I'm pretty good at just making stuff up.
I feel warm and fuzzy just thinking about it.
You are my inspiration.
I'd sing right now, but I have to go to learn how to can things at the church.
Maybe we could can something at my retreat.
I should come here more often.
Like that's even possible.

Morgan Moore said...

You fall in love with people easily and just as easily they fall in love with you.

Had a wonderful time.

xoxo

thorney said...

What a perfect retreat you and Chup had. I need a couples retreat. I keep looking at the couples retreats in Cannon Beach and I think it may be time to sign up for one of them asap.

--Mari

cortnieb said...

I LOVED LOVED LOVED this "maybe I love him most right now because he frees me up so I can love others. He doesn't crowd me out with jealousies or distrust, he knows that when I am full of love he gets the most of it. No matter how high the heaping of love, he will always be the top." This literally clicked something on in me that is like the greatest thing I've ever heard in my entire life!!!! Such powerful, true words! Thank you so very much, really....they come at a time that it means SO very much!!!

A Modest Girl's Public Confessions said...

You make me want to be more like you. i want to love people like that.

Butlers said...

Seriously, do you even ever respond to these comments? I wish wish WISH you could come up to the Seattle area. We would be fast friends. I love that you wear heels. So do I. They seem to elongate the body when you are top heavy. LOVE them!
You are a spitfire and honestly....we would probably be best friends. But alas,...I haven't gotten a mutual email from you. Take care crazy listless one...
from- sleepless in Seattle- oh yes I did

indiebanditas.com

mrs. r said...

baaam! that last photo of you too is the hotness!

Ruthann said...

Some of my favorite cjane posts of all time came from the retreat! The Mayor and La Doux are my awesome next door neighbors (we know how lucky we are!) And who doesn't love your Cousin, very cute and talented. I got to work with her eldest at school last year and she is darling--future famous writer or artist for sure. Thanks for always making me smile!

Corli said...

Loved it, all of it!!!

Casa de Mask said...

What an amazing getaway...it has motivated me to plan one with my hubby! It is all too easy to put quality time as husband and wife on the backburner when you are busy parents with young ones at home. These posts have been a nice reminder to me of the importance of taking time to "date" and escape the hustle and bustle together. I have so enjoyed reading about all the details of the retreat c jane and your photographs are absolutely stunning! :-)

Keya said...

What an awesome trip. You are truly blessed to be around such great spiritual people.

jed said...

love you too, cotus.

sarah sample said...

what a wonderful trip...love those photos.
xo