Like most people I don’t remember a whole lot when it comes to remembering my childhood. But I do remember not talking a lot. Isn’t that odd? That’s what I remember about my childhood?
I think this is confirmed because my older sister Page once made a drawing of her childhood and she said when it came to placing me into the picture I was “off by the bushes quietly talking to myself” but not to anyone around me.
Also my Aunt Cindy said it’s true that I didn’t talk a lot. I was the sixth of nine, you see and I didn't demand much attention. And even though my parents took good care of me, she said she’d worry about me, socially-like. This explains why she sent me a birthday gift when I was twelve from Laguna Beach where she lived.
It was a hot pink and white striped shirt with beaded and sequined artwork on the back--a "conversation starter" if you will--and no one else in my family got a birthday present from Aunt Cindy that year. Just me.
Fantastic.
The funny thing is that now, as an adult, I talk a lot but I never like it. If I were truer to myself I’d probably only talk about one fourth as much as I do. I really think my nature is to be a shy person, but I’ve taught myself to be more gregarious. More out-going. More chatty. All of these qualities seemed more of a sure bet for life. But when I am not blabbing around, I feel much more like me.
And even now I am telling myself, shhhhh.
this month I've decided to write a book while simultaneously breastfeeding my baby and battling the postpartum blues. should be a blast. stay tuned.
26 Pieces of Opinion:
I have become so much 'less' talky as I've gotten older...and I am a home-body (very boring) person.
So weird. Opposite of what I was when I was younger.
But I'm happy, so there ya go.
Is this reflection coming from writing your book? Can't wait lady.
me too Cjane. But I, for one, am glad that you open up.
You naturally "shy" people are the best type! Even if you have taught yourself how to be more "gregarious," you really have the most interesting things to say when you open up. Thank goodness for blogs! We might never see these parts of you in person.
Are you just talking about talking, or does that also include blogging? I'm like you, but I surprise myself how confident and yacky I am on my blog. It's just less "risky" I guess. Maybe not? Anyway, speaking of talking, I miss the vlogs...
Yep. I have always had something to say though. Just not out loud maybe. Perhaps that's why I had the imaginary friends. Two. I had a lot to say.
I'm 5th of 6 kids and the same way. When I'd walk to school with my older brother we'd walk in near silence for 45 minutes. He'd talk sometimes and sometimes it was to complain about how much I didn't talk...
I don't talk incessantly but I do talk much more than I'm ever comfortable with if the instant regret is anything to go by... I constantly feel like I have to perform in some way. I hate it.
I'm happiest just watching and listening. There's nothing wrong with being that way at all. So what if you never spoke that much as a child - I'll bet you were a very keen observer.
"A wise old owl sat on an oak.
The more he saw, the less he spoke.
the less he spoke, the more he heard...
Why can't we all be like that bird?"
I've always liked that little rhyme.
my new years resolution is to talk less! I've noticed that I've become that annoying talks over people and talks too much person even though I dont want to be that way.. i think its because I'm the eldest! always bossy ;) I come home from some social occasions hanging my head in shame thinking why why cant i just be the person that sits there and listens!! I just find I have so much to say lol!
I'm the 6th of nine also. I knew there was a reason I was drawn to you.
Wow I can't even tell you how much this sounds like I wrote it in my sleep (with more skill than I would in my sleep, of course). This perfectly explains my personality and you've really opened some things up to me. Thanks so much. Wow.
that is so funny! Well, I am glad that you talk, that's for sure. And I know a lot of other people are too. So maybe it's for other people that you have learned to be more outgoing.
I like that you're a writer. You really don't come across as shy at all. I've always been on the louder side when it comes to personality, but always had an admiration for the quieter ones. They were more interesting to me and mysterious and smart. In my youth, I figured they were the ones who would watch me, from their shadowy corner, "showing off" making a fool of myself, and just shake their heads.
Truth is they probably never thought twice about me and my antics.
"Many introverts use a form of power so subtle that power almost seems the wrong word. . . they make insightful suggestions. . . {and} alliances behind the scenes". -- Susan Cain, from Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. Featured in this month's O magazine. O magazine! It's true!
totally the same as me. i am a shy person, inside. but i force it down because that's not how to be successful with others. hm.
I'm just the opposite! I would like to talk more,but I always keep thinking "I should have said this or that" but I talk hours on the phone with my sister, but am mostly the listener.
Same here. I tell myself all the time that I talk (and say and share) WAAAAY too much. I try to stop, but I don't. I do like what you say though. ;)
I am number 5 of 7 and I am definitely shy and quiet. I am 23 and am realizing that I need to come out my shell a little so I am trying to force myself to be more open and outgoing. I definitely prefer to be quiet and keep to myself.
I love this! I feel like you just described me - as an adult, at least. I actually didn't realize until I read your description of being true to yourself that I feel exactly the same way. I've forced myself to be more outgoing, when it just feels more comfortable not to open my mouth so much. How odd! Thanks for that light bulb moment. Now how do we stop talking? ;)
P.S. So glad you open up via your blog!
I like this, you've described so clearly how I feel a lot of the times. Thanks for sharing.
New to this blog. Love your Fertility post THE most (it's been MY saving Grace)... anywho,
Thank you for opening up. Nice to see what was your foundation you stemmed from that has blossomed into a beautiful blogger.
I, too, was a quiet child. By default of lifes hardships, I decided I had to learn how to be social so I can get the jobs I needed to make ends meet. Now, I'm married and that life has calmed down a bit and theirs stability, I've returned to that quiet homebody. Yet, I'm such a social butterfly with mountains of opinions. What gives? Makes me think that sometimes we are born with some traits that are meant to be around. hmmm!
You just nailed exactly how I feel about myself! I ALWAYS look back on a situation and think I spoke way too much and probably too loudly. Love this post-and, that your Aunt Cindy sent you a "conversation starter." Awesome.
I used to talk alot as a child, but now as an adult I don't talk very often. It drives my husband crazy because he take it as me being indifferent to things.
I miss your VLOG's!!! :)
Sixth of 8. I was quiet too. But not now. And I also worrying that I'm annoying people when I talk like another commenter. Just part of being imperfect, I guess. Cjane, thanks for sharing.
Never commented before, but this time I had to... this is exactly what I've long thought about myself! Naturally shy, but I force myself to be outgoing. I've often wondered if I'm being true to myself. I finally decided a happy medium is best (to some degree gregarism (real word?) IS a necessary life skill). So nice to know that I'm not the only one, thanks. :)
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